That sound you hear is Maya Angelou's jaw hitting the floor. Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich says he considered offering Barack Obama's vacant senate seat to Oprah Winfrey. But in the end he evoked the "let's not and say we did" statute, and instead, he's being accused of trying to auction it off. Whoops! He was defending himself against that and other allegations of corruption on Good Morning America when he revealed his secret hope of a Senator O.

The governor said Oprah's name came up because she was considered a substantial influence in Barack Obama's election. Although it's undeniably exciting to envision a new golden age of Secret-inspired policy making (visualize the transit commission increase!), Oprah is sticking to her long-held position that she will only play puppet master in the political arena, and not enter it directly. She told her BFF Gayle King on her radio program that she would not have taken the role had Rod offered it.

"I would have said, 'Where would I fit it in with my day job?" Oprah asked. "My mid-day job, my night job, my radio job, my magazine job?'" She does, however, consider herself capable of the role. "I think I could be Senator too," she told Gayle. "I'm just not interested." I mean, the woman has dogs to raise.

It's true that Oprah's doing more good for the U.S. by getting people to read great fiction and try out new self-improvement techniques than by sitting in an office. It's too bad the U.S. doesn't have a Governor General. Oprah would be well-suited for a position that's mostly ceremonial (assuming parliament doesn't have a Britney-style meltdown and require you to call a time out, right Michaëlle Jean?). It's not like she's going to have an Oprah's Favourite Things day while in office where every household gets a luffa and basket of bath lotions. We have to save some things for heaven.